Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Still dying that you shit outside
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
