didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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