I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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