She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
