Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
That accounts for only three of the penises
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
