Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
