Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize