It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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