In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
