is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
