Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
