thus making me awesome and them whores
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
