Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
