The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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