Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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