That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
