I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize