i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...