Where is the hickey?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
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