any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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