ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Randomize