Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
