new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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