We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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