You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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