there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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