Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
