This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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