I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
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I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
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also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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