well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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