Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
