Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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