Me too!
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
