We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I licked your asshole in confidence.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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