CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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