im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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