matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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