I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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