you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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