You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He did a backflip because drugs
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
