Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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