SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
