I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
