The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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