So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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