this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
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False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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