You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
