We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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