My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
