He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
