dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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