adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
