I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
