The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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